Flood.

Okay, so some updates.

1. My beloved Bronco is pretty much toast. The transmission is just about to go, and when it goes, that's the end. I've already spent a lot of time crying over it. Right now I'm driving what I not-so-affectionately refer to as 'the Death Trap,' which was generously lent to me by my grandparents. It's a tiny little piece of crap truck that I don't really fit in (neither does Chris); it's loud, has the worst windshield wipers on the face of the earth, and let's not even mention the brakes that squeak so loud that people five blocks away know when I'm home. Sigh. My parents decided I should get a 'new' car, and that process has been EXTREMELY stressful and frustrating, and has been put off a lot by another lovely development in my life, which brings us to...

2. My mom has cancer. I don't remember the whole scientific-y name for it, but it's a rare subcategory of non-Hodgkins lymphoma that is (thank the Lord) extremely treatable, dare we say "curable." She has a pretty big tumor in her chest that has the consistency of cotton candy and it's growing pretty rapidly, so the doctors think that chemo will be very effective. (That's something I learned - chemo affects the fastest-growing cells in the body, which is why you lose your hair.) I'm hoping so, because she's suffering a lot. The tumor has paralyzed one of her vocal chords which has made it so her throat can't close, which means she coughs a lot because of the mucous running down her trachea. It's awful. She also has to sleep with oxygen because her left lung is at about 50% capacity and she's short of breath a lot. She also can't really eat much because of the vocal chord thing (plus the tumor is pushing on her throat too) so she's always hungry. Plus she itches, all the time, which is just kind of like adding insult to injury. It's really frustrating for me because it's not something I can go beat up for messing with my mom. But she's the strongest woman I know and she'll beat this thing right outta the ballpark.

3. Not that it was going to happen anytime soon, but now this means that for sure there will be no wedding in 2012. My mom said we can't get married until she has hair, which I'm completely okay with. My mother's streak of vanity runs in me as well, and I know that she would hate being bald in her baby girl's wedding pictures - and I wouldn't exactly be the biggest fan of it either. Short hair, I can handle. It can be like, "Oh, look at how great my mom looks after kicking cancer's ass!" rather than, "Well here's my mom in the middle of chemo, something we don't really like remembering." Okay, okay, so I'm sure that by reading that you're assuming that things are going really well with Chris, and you are 100% right. He is so fantastic and wonderful and I just... mmm! I love him! We spent the weekend with my family at the cabin and it was super fun. He even won major points with my mom when he took care of my little nephew Jason (and even got him to stop crying/put him back to sleep- IT'S THE WARM HANDS). I'll admit it, watching him fawn over a baby was super adorable. Babies really aren't my thing, so it's good to know that he likes them enough to handle them when I go completely crazy and can't stand them anymore. In, you know, like, ten years. (When I off-handedly mentioned that, my mom said, "Really, you think it'll be that long?" Yes, mother, I don't want children in med school. And besides, that means you'll get a bigger time span with babies to squeeze!)

4. I think I decided to go back to school for sure. I don't know. There's just... ugh. I just. I hate college. But part of me knows I should just suck it up and do it.

5. I still need a vacation, even though I haven't really done much in the past... three months... Sigh.

I'm so stressed out that my period is late again, which is stressing me out even more. (Not that I have any reason to stress over that, I just don't like it when my body isn't doing what it's supposed to. Which is actually does a lot...)

Gravity.

Okay, I'm a totally bad liar, I can't stay away from this thing. I'm like the moon and blogger is Earth. Whatever. Anyway. So, a few updates.

1. I have the most killer goggle tan on the planet. I'll post a good picture asap.

2. I still haven't missed a Woods family birthday. Chris's dad's this weekend made six. In less than four months.

3. On the subject of Woods family birthdays, Chris's little sister Kitt is probably one of my favorite people. Seriously, coolest twelve year old ever.

4. Again on the subject of Woods family birthdays, Beatles Rock Band. Vocals. 99% on Expert. WHAT WHAT?! Yeah. That's right.

5. Lastly on the subject of Woods family birthdays. Bumper cars. 'nuff said.

6. WESTERN CUP IN FOURRRRRR DAYSSSSSSSSS.

7. Sleeping in on Tuesdays now because I'm not gonna lie, I'm super burned out right now. Thanks Kipper.

8. Staying in school.

9. Johnny Lingo! A wise philosophy.

10. NEW SKIS.

11. Um. Finally bought a road bike. Yup. Stoked. So, so, so stoked.

12. My mom's birthday today, and realizing that my dad is turning FIFTY SEVEN this year. Yikes.

13. My roommates (well, other than my room-roommate) drive me completely insane. I might have to take a picture of their toilet before we have cleaning checks, it is seriously the most disgusting thing I have ever seen, and they've only lived here two months. Thankfully our gas bills are going down, but our last electric bill was A HUNDRED AND TWENTY FIVE DOLLARS. I've just about had it.

Tomorrow is my interview for my ecclesiastical endorsement. Hopefully my bishop will sign it... perks of working Sundays, yeah!

Sigh. I gots a paper to write.

Six.

That's how many consecutive days Chris and I have spent together in the past seven-day period. Yep, six. Birthday weekend turned into birthday which turned into finals all-nighter, so technically today (Wednesday) is only PARTLY contributing to the six, but w/e, it sounds more impressive/awesome. However, now I have to wait until Sunday to see him. *face melts into indecipherable expression*
But then we get to have another 'weekend' aka he's going to hang out in Provo for like four days and whenever I'm not working we'll be together. And when I am working he may or may not be vegging at my apartment playing Skyrim on The Gorgeous. Or watching Netflix. Or sleeping on my couch. My roommates won't be home, so I need someone to guard my stuff while I'm not there! (Right.) Either way, the month of December is going to involve plenty of Chris-Jen togetherness.

Next semester is going to suck.

The job at Sundance is still going ab fab, I'm finally to the point where I'm teaching lessons by myself, NBD.

The job at Outdoors alternates between putting me to sleep and making me want to kill all of the people who come in all at once wanting to return/rent skis. Grrrrrrrrr.

School is almost over. One more paper to wrap up and then I'm free, for better or for worse. There is light at the end of the tunnel, and I'm not going to lie, I'm SO excited to get rid of the permanent headache that settled on me last week it's kind of ridiculous. I'm not even nervous about my last final, not even remotely. I'm just nervous about finishing my paper.

On the subject of papers, I don't know if I've told you all, but there have been a few times that Chris has told me that I'm "the best girlfriend" he's ever had. (Although I haven't actually heard him say it in a while, which is okay I suppose. It's just not something I ever get tired of hearing.) To be honest, he had been chilling at the topmost tier since before we even started dating, but there hasn't really been anything to this point that has "blown my mind." Until now. It's not even something that seems like a big deal, but it was huge to me. Some people might think of 'mind blowing' as some completely over-the-top romantic event, but to me, it was simply him helping me with my paper. Because of his help I was able to get it done on time, which might just save my grade. He had tons of studying to do himself, but instead he opted to help me. Seriously, I'm still in a little bit of disbelief. I know he doesn't think of it as that big of a deal, and some of you are probably like, "What? Something that simple makes him the best boyfriend you've ever had?" My answer to you is most assuredly yes. By small and simple means great things are brought to pass!

My family might call me a broken record, but I'm more crazy about this boy than I've ever been about anybody else. AND he got the, "he's really cute!" seal of approval from my mother. Which is a big deal to me. She called Brandon 'nice' (code for "what on earth are you thinking Jen?") and she never met Nine Toes. I honestly don't remember if she liked Mitsubishi or not, seriously, I remember very little about that relationship, even though it was essentially eight months long from start to finish and we had very seriously talked marriage. The last boy she called "really cute" was Dork Boy, and I don't think I've talked about him, but my mother LOVED HIM, in fact I think she's still secretly disappointed that I let him get away. Even though that was almost two and a half years ago and he's married now. Yeah. Either way, lately every time I've been invited to 'family things' it has been "would you and Chris like to come/be able to make it to..." YEAH. I don't think I have to tell you how much I really like that. I've always wanted to be "you and boy." And now I am. I love it I love it I love it.

Sunday is the Woods family Christmas party, and I don't know if I should be excited or nervous. Now that I think I'm over the parents hurdle I'm not particularly nervous. Besides, I'll be with Chris. Other than remembering to keep the PDA toned down (it will have been FOUR DAYS since our last time together, talk about difficult!!!! LOLz) I don't think I have much to worry about.

Tomorrow is a full day at Sundance, followed by Friday morning there as well. (Friday will be awesome, because I'll be off by 12:30 and don't have to be at work at Outdoors until four. Skiiiiiiinnnnngggggggggggg.) Stoked. I love skiing. I love Sundance. And teaching is okay too I guess.

OH, and today a tandem bike fell on my leg as I fell through a rack of skis. I'll be sure to post a photo/diagram tomorrow. It hurt. And I want you to fully grasp why.

Crash.

Well, that lasted a really long time...

Haha, don't worry, things are still good with Chris (nay, great, he gets better by the minute), but the high I've been riding on for the last couple of days just came to a screeching halt. My mom called to give me my tax info for my FAFSA (I almost said FAFSA application... redundancy derp) and we of course ended up on the subject of tuition (for fall and winter-keep in mind this is almost 5 grand). Yeah... I don't have it. I've spent the last four months fretting away most of my income on gear, clothes, gear, gasoline, and gear - plus necessities of life like rent and food. It's not something I'm particularly proud of, but it's kind of that "I have money! It feels good! I'm going to buy those two forty dollar carabiners!" feeling. I realize this is scary. Again, not something I'm proud of. I know money can't buy happiness, but the way I feel in those clothes, or the fun I have with that gear, or whatever... I don't want to say it's priceless, but to me it kind of is. I'm admittedly really insecure, you all know this. When I wear that Patagonia pullover or those Chacos, I FEEL SO FREAKING COOL. When I show up on the ski hill in the newest, coolest helmet and goggles, and everyone is jealous? Oh my gosh, words cannot describe the feeling that fills me with. Even if no one is jealous, I just feel better in that stuff.

I'm not trying to rationalize my bad habits. I'm just trying to say, there's reasoning behind it. And everything I've bought I've used - A LOT. (Well, the helmet and goggles and FatCats I WILL use a lot - every single day this winter.) The rock climbing gear? (Rope, quickdraws, carabiners, etc.) I used FOUR DAYS A WEEK all summer long. Want to do the math? Okay, I wouldn't either. Probably about 48 times. Roughly six dollars a day. I made probably that much in an hour, and that's less than half of what I would pay to go climb at a gym (which is significantly less enjoyable), plus the quickdraws and carabiners will last 3-4 years. (Draws are supposed to be replaced every 3 years.) When I start climbing twice a week with Hands, I'm going to use my rope a lot more, because we're going to get lead certified. At the beginning of the summer, or when I go on my mission, or when I go on my Study Abroad, my rope is going to get retired to be a boat rope at my family's cabin. It will get to have that job until it can't anymore. Waaaaa! Long life, and tons of enjoyment. Thanks rope, you were an excellent purchase.

There were admittedly things I should've been more careful about. I should've looked longer and harder for a cheaper Foo Fighters ticket, instead of freaking out and making a rookie mistake when I realized I hadn't bought a ticket yet. That was dumb, I admit it. The concert was INCREDIBLE, but I do wish I would've spent less money on it. I shouldn't have bought two iPod cases. That was pointless and a waste. I really didn't need to buy that Clymb t-shirt to get 'free shipping'. Yeah, essentially buying that shirt made shipping twenty bucks instead of eight. But I wanted it. And I do feel super cool wearing it. I really don't NEED those Chacos, but man I love them, and man they are good looking, and man I feel good about myself when I wear them. ("No! Jen, you don't need shoes to complete you!")

Other than the Foo Fighters tickets though, I looked for the best deals on stuff. (Those Chacos? 60% off retail.) And yeah, I probably could've only sank a couple hundred bucks into my old computer to fix it, but I WILL ADMIT IT, I wanted a computer that could play Skyrim. It's stupid. But Skyrim will provide me with literally hundreds of hours of entertainment.

Seriously, writing this makes me want to cry. I'm so stressed about school, and I miss Chris a lot, and now I have this on top of my shoulders. I have to come up with the money by March, plus pay my credit card bills (I NEVER, EVER do 'minimum payments'. It's all, or as much as I possibly can, which is usually all, though that generally ends up completely draining my bank account - doesn't that get me some bonus points?) and keep up with rent/eat. Sigh. I'm so scared. Why does this always happen to me?

Because I 'wanted it'. And little things add up. SOOO freaking fast. :'( I need a hug.

On a positive note though, I get to spend a good chunk of my day today with Chris. When I actually think about that instead of my current situation, I'm so excited, I can hardly breathe. But between that and SKYRIM (!!!!!!) I won't really have time to really post today, which is why I'm posting this at 1:30 in the morning. Yuuuuuupppp. And I'm up because I have cleaning checks. Boooo.