Purge.

So, today I did a 'friend purge' on Facebook. I deleted a bunch of people that I never talk to and wouldn't talk to if I saw them on the street or on campus or whatever. It really wasn't anything personal, it was just pointless. Facebook in general is pointless, but there have been more than a few times where I've seen a person pop up on my news feed and thought, 'Why on earth am I still friends with that person?' Now I've gotten rid of a bunch of them and it is extremely satisfying. (No offense guys...)
Anyway, today is my second full day in Boise and for the most part it's just like any other place in the world. Except that some of the time it's better, because it has Brandon in it. Sappy moment over. But seriously, I missed him like crazy and it has been so wonderful to get to hang out with him. Even though he's not my boyfriend anymore, he's still my best friend and being around him makes me happy. It's funny, I don't even care what we do, even if we just sit and watch a movie or watch his fire burn, I'm perfectly happy. I hate missing him. I hate having him far away. And to be honest, I kinda hate that I fell in love with him. It was definitely not my intention, to say the very least.
But that's not the point. The point is, I'm really glad I came.

Boise.

Where's a map?

So, I'm going to Boise with Bre. She needed someone to come with her, and I wanted to go see Brandon, so it worked out nicely. And I have to say, even though it has been made very clear to me that nothing is going to happen, I am absurdly excited to see that boy! I mean, come on, he is my best friend after all. Anyway, I just wanted to let you all know.

Also, I'm sorry I've been AWOL for a while. I've been working a lot and moving and running around like a chicken with its head cut off. But for the most part, I've been feeling pretty good.

Great news though! (I'm pretty sure.) I'm still on probation, which means I get to stay at Aspen Grove for the summer, AND stay at BYU in the fall!!!! Unless I end up deciding to go to South Africa for a horse internship... but I suppose we'll have to see. The craziest thing is, my mom is actually like, supporting the idea. It's kind of weird. But anyway, here's the link. http://wildcoasthorsebackadventures.yolasite.com/volunteer-program.php

I NEED TO SLEEP! So, good night world.

Hurt.

So, today Brandon went home to Boise, and I feel like someone punched me in the chest. I'm honestly not sure I've felt so awful in a long time. I love him and I know he loves me and I don't know if that makes it better or worse. Last night when I couldn't keep myself from crying he cried too. A guy has NEVER cried saying goodbye to me before. It broke my heart. I didn't want him to leave. I don't want to stop dating him. I want to keep seeing him every day. I want to hug him and hold his hand and not ever let go.
I hate this.